Through Thick and Thin, Just Keep Moving Forward
Below is a conversation with a former coworker of mine. We share a lot of the same feelings of what it means to be unemployed. I think a lot of people nowadays feel the same way. You have to look after your own self-interest. Don't be fooled by companies who say they have your well-being in mind. Take charge of that for yourself.
Me
Can you share the story of how you become unemployed in the past?
M
Most recently I became unemployed because my company I was working for went out of business. They had to shut down basically they were consulting firm, and too many of their clients went out of business at once and owed us money. It was like half a million and the owner had a meeting with us one day and said hey guys I've got a month worth of payroll left and then I'm not gonna be able to pay you so take that money and we're just gonna shut the doors and I had a month warning and was unemployed.
Me
Was that the first time?
M
It was not. I have been unemployed a number of times. That's the second time I've been laid off. I also had one during Covid where the company just from all the Covid chaos was trying to reduce headcount so they furloughed us sort of indefinitely and I was never brought back personally situation. We had a phone call one day which was a bit of a surprise and was like hey everyone's furloughed and no one's getting money that was a much more immediate situation. I think immediate if I remember correctly, you would know obviously you were there, but you might not remember, but I think that was immediate and it was just like no one's getting paid now. Luckily, that in that case we were furloughed, so I was able to retain my health insurance. They were paying to pay their part of it.
Me
Yeah, I was there unfortunately
M
I've also quit a number of times and not always with something lined up, but it's a bit of a different situation when you can plan for it obviously then when it comes at you unexpectedly, which both of those were somewhat of a little bit in both cases, I think there were hints, but I tend to be more of an optimist and didn't really give the hints credence and was a little surprised both times.
Me
What were your initial feelings and thoughts after each of those times or if you could summarize all in one?
M
Yeah, I think the feelings are very different depending on how it's handled so I think in both situations I understood the situation that the type of communication was sort of different and so the first one which is the second one I mentioned, but the earlier instance of being laid off or being furloughed I think I was pretty pissed. Just the way it was communicated the tone and the lack of information especially in that situation. We're furloughed, so they're acting like we're gonna come back and I do believe they brought some people back. It wasn't fully bullshit but the communication was not there. I was in a senior technology leadership position at the time and they furloughed me and my entire team and hadn't talked to me about it at all and I found that offensive, I guess. That hurt enough in my pride or whatever but I just I think the way they dealt with it made a big difference where as I didn't in the second situation and it was very clear. Communication is exactly what's happening. There was clear empathy for what was happening to the employees. I think the owner of that company felt bad whereas I don't think the other way ever got that impression. I remember on the first one they called me and told me before any of my team was told. I had about 10 people probably working for me. And they didn't know some of the people's names on the team. It was just very impersonal, and it felt very corporate bullshit and not even in my opinion good business thinking that was happening there. I had really liked the second job a lot. I like all the people there and the situation was really kind of a dream job for me in a lot of ways, so that was, it was a lot of disappointment, but I wasn't angry at anyone because I really kinda understood what it happened and the communication made that a lot less painful for the communication in the clear empathy. I think make a huge difference. When you have to make those layoffs and making it not be a thing that's as hard I think you can handle that in a way that makes it less hurtful to people if you take a little time to consider them before you do it.
Me
How did it impact your daily life routine?
M
What happened during Covid was pretty gnarly because you go from working to not working as a huge impact on your routine and you have a full-time job in any situation. However the Covid one was really tough as well. Just because you couldn't go out and do anything you couldn't you know? Go to a bar and vent with your friends, and do any of the things that I would typically do to kinda let off some steam. I'm a very outgoing, social person and so not having that and also not having a job anymore to occupy my time was tough. Other people obviously were in very similar situations at that time. My sleep schedule got all out of whack. I kinda lost track of days versus nights and you have nothing super productive to put your time towards, no one to hang out with, no responsibilities because you can’t. It really impacts how you spend your time and what you do and that. Spent a lot of time playing video games, which I don't even normally do just cause it was the only thing to do at home alone. Drinking and smoking a lot more than I normally would do because there was nothing else going on and that seemed to help so you know it was not great in that way. The second time I think it was you know I buy that in the coming to go out of business, obviously the whole world isn't shut down, so I had a lot more outlets for my frustration or might you know aimlessness or whatever you wanna call it. I was living with my girlfriend so I had support mechanisms at home. I had the financial support at home. So that was that was really helpful but you're going from having something to do all day. This is a huge change and I think the second time I had also at one point earlier between the two I quit a job with nothing lined up. I just gotten set up with with a employer and left so I kind of developed already some skills or I planned that and developed skills around how to stay busy during the day and keep myself engaged in other projects. I think in the second case, I was a lot more prepared for it as well but I think having personal side projects is important really in all three cases that was kind of how I managed it so during Covid, I gave myself the project of building a motorcycle like tore it apart. An old motorcycle I had and started rebuilding it kind of from scratch find out the right term since it was a motorcycle, but I'm doing a lot of a lot of heavy remodeling of the motorcycle was the project I gave myself just to keep myself busy. In the second one it was yeah I took on sort of musical and writing more creative projects and some self guided soft development projects as well and new skills type stuff so I think five for me finding concrete activities that I can focus on when I'm unemployed is really important to keeping my brain mental healthy.
Me
What unexpected challenges did you face and how did you ever come then?
M
Yeah, so I think I mentioned some and kind of the last answer a little bit there but the major one this last time I had just bought a house with my girlfriend so we literally just moved in like a month maybe two months earlier. I actually believe our first mortgage payment hadn't come due yet. If I remember correctly, it was it was really close. I haven't bought a house that was a big surprise there. Overcoming that was honestly just some budget cutting. I cut a lot of my personal hobbies, spending disposable income type expenses and then also had the support of my partner who picked up a lot of the slack and was very supportive through that so just yeah, really clear communication between us about how we're gonna budget and what I'm gonna be able to contribute and how long we can maintain that and like what that means. We didn't take a vacation that year which normally we like to do so that was sort of a thing we gave up as well, but was likely able to manage that with her help.
Me
How did unemployment shape your career goals or direction?
M
That's a good question I think for me I like two answers. I wanna say I have worked for the last I don't know what 10 years now maybe eight at specifically in startup environments and sort of purposefully seeking that environment out. Some of this I've kind of planned for and like it's expected that companies are gonna go under. You're gonna change jobs every year or two is sort of how I picture my career anyway. So in that way, it's it was sort of an expected bump in the road and not something that it was completely unplanned for. I think on the other hand in which it occurred specifically in at least the first situation as well as some of my later jobs that I ended up at and some because you when you get surprised by those things, especially you can take whatever comes along as you end up a job you're not super crazy about and you know that going in which is the unfortunate part of it that impacts your career, but also just like seeing how sort of the ownership of companies handle that and then like at some of those other jobs I ended up at how I was treated. I do think that changed the way I view the employer employee relationship pretty significantly and can put me more in a mindset of like realize they're out for themselves and that became very clear especially in the first layoff and it's some of the subsequent jobs I had to take just because that was always available. I think that the corporate mindset of it but like it's about the money and I don't matter as a person in that equation, kind of shaped how I approach my work in response. I think it's more healthy to me. I think now to engage with work in a similar way that I need to take my wealth and my own financial health ahead of the companies. And that the company is just the company, they are not you know looking after me like maybe I'd still sort of believed before some of the situations I've been in.
Me
Any other lessons outside of what you experienced or what you described?
M
Yeah, I mean I think I think the biggest lesson is sort of coming out of that last question for me was like don't you know. I've had this conversation with some other of my peers through the years like talking through job offers and things. Yeah, look out for yourself. The company is not looking out for you is really like I think the big lesson that you can learn in unemployment or when you get laid off.
Especially now like I've seen the last year so it's been pretty rough too now we're going on for tech so like lots of my friends or former coworkers I've been laid off and you talk about it and I think it's really like some of these layoffs don't have much of a reasoning behind them other than these companies can't support these employees. It’s that the stock price looks better if we lay people off so we're gonna do it and I think the lesson I learn and the advice I try to get people to keep that in mind when you think about your job.
So an example when I was just talking to somebody a couple months ago. They had been laid off and they took a job because I needed one. I've been in that situation so take whatever comes along and then something else came along. It's like should I feel bad leaving this company? I just started here. And that's where I think of like they would gladly fire you if they needed to or wanted to or thought it would make the money somehow so you should be willing to leave them if something better comes along for you. It doesn't need to be. You don't need to be a dick about it. I don't think that's the right answer. I don't think it's you trying to rip off your employer and get 10 jobs and I don't think that's necessarily the healthiest response either but keeping your own priorities in mind I think is a big lesson I would share with people.
Me
Do you have any advice for someone within unemployment? Maybe they don't have a job yet or a job lined up but you know day-to-day I guess of how to deal with unemployment.
M
If you're not purposefully in unemployment, unemployment sucks and my advice is like there's the things you have to do. You have to cut budget probably in your personal life and make hard decisions there and you have to do things like you aggressively start apply for jobs and be more open to jobs that you wouldn't have been open for either at lower levels or lower pay scales or companies where you don't like their jobs that seem weird whatever. The things you're gonna have to do I think you kinda have to also find a silver lining there of like cool now I do have spare time. Let's spend it on something that is gonna make me happy to have gotten that out and that would be my advice on dealing with it like find yourself a project like I mentioned some of mine earlier. Find something to do with your time that you'll feel good about that you wouldn't have done had you been employed because then you can at least tell yourself at night like this sucks but at least I'm getting to know work on this motorcycle or do his personal project. Maybe you've got some idea that'll make you money but most likely you're not doing that and you know, I never finished my motorcycle. It's not like that's even the point my opinion, but I think try and use that time and not be completely sad and upset about it in like there is something nice to getting an extended vacation. It comes with a lot of awful things in this particular case, but like that doesn't mean you shouldn't try to get some enjoyment out of the positive side of that.
Me
How do you think society or even employers can better support people who are unemployed if at all?
M
I would say they barely do it. I've collected it [unemployment] twice now. During Covid, it was a lot better, but it still sucks. It sucks. Either way I took it both times and the support is terrible. The little processes of getting it are terrible. The technology that supports it is terrible. It's not a ton of money like it doesn't last very long the process you have to do to keep it coming is obnoxious. It is miserable like I think we could do 1 billion other things to make that process better. I won't try and rant about my feelings on how that should work. If the budget for supporting unemployment is saying we're not moving in a lake without moving down we wanna have bigger safety net or spend more money on the budget. We have to be able to do a better job at that I think. I just think parts of it are intentionally hard. Maliciously designed to be so because people are worried about people taking advantage of it or whatever and I think that sucks because you know for lots of people, myself included and most of the people I know who've been through it that's not what's happening. So it's just obnoxious have to deal with this antagonistic process in my opinion.
Me
Is there anything you would've done differently during your employment?
M
The second time for sure, so this might be perfect advice for anyone who finds themselves in situation, especially given what I just said apply for unemployment benefits the second you know you're unemployed. It takes a while to get approved. The process is a pain and it takes a while. By the second time I was laid off, especially having the month of pay safety net there but then even after probably two or three months, I was telling myself that I would quickly find a new job and it wasn't worth the effort to pursue those benefits. If I was only gonna collect them for a month or two. So I put it off and then eventually realized oh shoot I need these and they don't work retroactively so you don't get them for the months you didn't apply so I'd say apply as soon as possible even if you think it's only gonna be a week of unemployment when you're gonna get this new job real quickly right like I said, I tend to think more positively about those kind of things but better to be safe than sorry and apply as early as you can for those benefits and you've paid into them. Don't feel bad about getting them like you you've paid into your unemployment. It is your money. You should collect it even if it's only for two weeks, but especially if it ends up, unfortunately, taking longer than that, don’t you wanna get that money as soon as possible?
